[초등영작 8탄] 내 아이 영어 작문실력 엿보기? > 초등영어 게시판

아래의 컨텐츠는 초등학생이 직접 작성한 영어작문을 원어민 선생님이 실제로 첨삭지도 한 내용입니다.
또래 아이들의 영어작문 결과를 통해 내 아이 작문기초도 살~작 엳보는 기회로 활용하세요.

[작문주제입니다]

Let's talk about the relationship of your friends.

[학생이 작성한 Essay 원문이며 빨간표시는 원어민 선생님이 첨삭(수정)한 부분입니다]

How 1. is 2. reationship with your 3. friends 4. club morie cimp uter muis sprts school best friends girl friends boy friends good friends bed friends the back good friends many

[원어민 선생님의 유혈별 첨삭내용이며 어떻게 써야 더 알맞은 표현인지 알 수 있는 대목입니다]

Grammar_Conjugation/동사변화활용 1. is : are
Grammar_Punctuation/부호사용 3. friends : friends?
Essay Format_Sentence Structure/문장의 구성 2. reationship : your relationships 4. club morie cimp uter muis sprts school best friends girl friends boy friends good friends bed friends the back good friends many : Well, I met my best friends when I joined the Computer Club, Music Club, and Sports Club. I have many girl and boy friends. Some of them are nice, while some are not. (?)
Essay Format_inappropriate Words/단어사용 적절성

[학생이 작성한 작문에 대해 원어민 선생님이 아래와 같이 코멘트를 남겨 주셨네요]

Hi. I'm glad that you were able to express your opinion in this essay. It's good that you exerted effort, but I think you need to exert more. Try to develop an introduction, body, and conclusion by adding more relevant details and by elaborating your sentences concisely. Then, revise your sentences to make them more meaningful. Pay attention to word usage, verb forms and tenses, and use of logical connectors. Also, use punctuation marks properly. Do not forget to put a period after every sentence and a comma whenever it is needed. Likewise, when you have an interrogative sentence, please do not forget to put a question mark at the end of it. Lastly, always review and edit your essay to avoid having mistakes such as misspelled words. Continue studying to further develop your skills and widen your vocabulary, too. I know you can do it! Good luck and have a great day!

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