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[Ãʵî÷»è 24ź] ³» ¾ÆÀÌ ¿µ¾î Writing ½Ç·ÂÀº?

  • ¿ÕÆÄÆÄ
  • |
  • 2010-03-29
0

¾Æ·¡ÀÇ ÄÁÅÙÃ÷´Â ÃʵîÇлýÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ¿µ¾îÀÛ¹®À» ¿ø¾î¹Î ¼±»ý´ÔÀÌ ½ÇÁ¦·Î ÷»èÁöµµ ÇÑ ³»¿ëÀÔ´Ï´Ù.
¶Ç·¡ ¾ÆÀ̵éÀÇ ¿µ¾îÀÛ¹® °á°ú¸¦ ÅëÇØ ³» ¾ÆÀÌ ÀÛ¹®±âÃÊ!! »ì~ÀÛ 엳º¸´Â ±âȸ·Î Ȱ¿ëÇϼ¼¿ä.

°°ÀºÁÖÁ¦·Î ³» ¾ÆÀÌ¿¡°Ô Á÷Á¢ ½áº¸°Ô ÇϽô °Íµµ Writing ½Ç·ÂÀ» Up½ÃŰ´Â ÁÁÀº ¹æ¹ýÀÔ´Ï´Ù.


 [ÀÛ¹®Á¦¸ñ]

Is it better to research on the Internet or in books? Include specific reasons and examples to support your answer.  

 

[ÇлýÀÛ¹®]

I think researching in books is 1. better. Because when you research in books you could 2. know more better anwers. For 3. example 4. there if you want to know how you 5. eat in 6. the space there are two ways to search about it. First, you could search it on 7. internet. Second, you could search it in books. If you search it on 8. internet you could see 9. video about it and it is 10. easy. 11. But if you search it in the books it may take time but still you could 12. know better 13. informations about 14. it 15. and there is more you could 16. see it any where.
So, I think that searching in books is better than searching on 17. Internet.


 

[÷»è³»¿ë]

Grammar_Articles(the, a or an)/°ü»ç
6. the space : space,
Note: Add a comma.
7. internet : the Internet
Note: Capitalize the noun.
8. internet : the Internet
9. video : a video
17. Internet : the Internet
Grammar_Prepositions(on, at, from, by, to.....)/ÀüÄ¡»ç
Grammar_Conjunction(and, but)/Á¢¼Ó»ç
4. there if : if
11. But : However,
Note: Add a comma.
Grammar_Capitalization/´ë¼Ò¹®ÀÚ
15. and : And
Grammar_Conjugation/µ¿»çº¯È­È°¿ë
5. eat : can eat
Grammar_Punctuation/ºÎÈ£»ç¿ë
3. example : example,
Essay Format_Sentence Structure/¹®ÀåÀÇ ±¸¼º
1. better. Because : better because
10. easy : easy to find this
16. see it any where : find out about it than anywhere else
Essay Format_inappropriate Words/´Ü¾î»ç¿ë ÀûÀý¼º
2. know more : get
12. know : gain
13. informations : information
14. it : the subject.
Note: Add a period.

 

[°­»ç Comments]

The article was well-constructed in most parts. Take note of a few articles (a, an, the) you need to insert (particularly before 'Internet'), noncount nouns like 'information' as it should not end with S, and some word choices. As for the content, bring in specific information that can give an explanation of your main idea. For example, if the main idea is searching in books can get us better information, name specific information we can get in books that we can't easily find in the Internet. You have the skill to write good sentences, so stretch your article and work on details that can make the article more fresh and engaging.

Keep expanding your vocabulary. We're looking forward to your future articles!

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